Good Sport

I found this on The Sun website. In fairness we were awful and I would have probably mocked the POMs if we had won so

Q: What is the main function of the Australia coach?

A:To transport the team from the hotel to the ground.

Q: What do you call an Australian with a champagne bottle in his hand?

A:A waiter.

Q: Who spends the most time on the crease of anyone in the Australian team?

A:The woman who ironed the cricket whites.

Q: Why don't Aussie fielders need pre-tour travel injections?

A: Because they never catch anything.

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Q: What's the Aussie version of a hat trick?

A: Three runs in three balls.

Q: What do Aussie batsmen and drug addicts have in common?

A:Both spend most of their time wondering where their next score will come from.

Q: What is the most proficient form of footwork displayed by Australian batsmen?

A:The walk back to the pavilion.

Q: What did the spectator miss when he went to the toilet?

A:The entire Australian innings.

Q: What's the Australian version of LBW?

A:Lost, Beaten, Walloped.

Q: Why do Australians call their favourite drink XXXX?

A:Because they can't spell beer.

Funny e-mail

I got this the other day.

Last month, a survey was conducted by the UN. The only question asked was:"Would you please give your honest opinion about solutions to the food shortage in the rest of the world?"The survey was a HUGE failure because:

In Africa they didn't know what "food" meant.

In Eastern Europe they didn't know what "honest" meant.

In Western Europe they didn't know what "shortage" meant.

In China they didn't know what "opinion" meant.

In the Middle East they didn't know what "solution" meant.

In South America they didn't know what "please" meant.

And in the USA they didn't know what "the rest of the world" meant.

Very funny but yet so true. If Australia was important enough to be noticed what do you think they'd say about us?

French Slip

I'm watching the French Australian rugby union game (easy choice over Brisbane Lions V Melb) and was reminded of an incident when Townsville hosted the french team. After the game there was an article written by a team official or a french journalist and he praised the Townsville crowd for their support and friendliness towards the french team even going to the extent of learning the french national anthem. However what he didn't realise was the tune from the French national was used for the theme song for the brisbane lions. And as they had just won a few premierships (The only time lions get support is when they are winning) most knew the song. It did sound like people were singing the Anthem but then "All for one, one for all.... Brisbane lions, brisbane lions rang out" Ooops. And who says the french think the world revolves around them.